Wednesday, March 12, 2014

It has been a really long time since I have been on
I have been doing sooo much since I have been MIA. Mothering, felting (which is a new one), working with ladies, and learning so much.

I am about to start utilizing this space more for a venting location, both positive and negative... (hopefully more + tho)

Peace to all

Monday, August 27, 2012


Transitions occur though out life, I tend to stumble.
Excited at the discovery, nervous as it beckons.
Stepping up to engage with deep breath, I progress...

Monday, February 6, 2012

Taking complete responsibility for how I feel.

Stopping the victim role of blaming others for making me feel a certain way...
I am in control of me.

I will watch due to old programming how I want to blame outer circumstances for my feeling , at that point regain control.

Baby steps.....

Thursday, January 26, 2012


It has been 6 months since I have posted...
I am exercising 3 x weekly,
I have stopped smoking cigarettes,
I have started drinking green smoothies again,
I have turned my monkey mind over to the process of analysis as far as it comes to my responsibilities in my life and thus co-creation of my physical world.
There are times in my life when I clearly remember having beef with any and all that have carried a close relationship with me.
Looking back now I can see the problem is something with myself...
Pinpointing the exact issue is cloudy at this point.
I am listening to a program on, very interesting insight this dude has...
Seems to be Buddhist with a core space of ultimate love as the essence.
The man who run the site is named Gary, who states that the earliest memory one has holds a significant part place marker of  where deep issues began, remembering the bad things stick (I will research more about this concept)...
I can remember sitting around a fire on my grandparents land and my father being there... I was dancing and twirling around as sparks from the fire lite and crackled in exact rhythm of my dance that streamed from my heart...
ooh I loved my father and that night her looked at me and said to everyone,"look at my beautiful movie star"...
I felt like the most special being in the universe...
we were connected and we both mirrored pure ultimate love for each other...
I must have been 4-5 years old.
My father started to separate from our family shortly after that time and completely severed all ties by the time I was 11 years old.
Entering a space of being a preteen and then a teen I told my self that I was not good enough to keep my Father around...
at least have him take me with where ever her was...
We was my first love.

Who completely and utterly shattered my heart into a million pieces.

Now to start from there...
Thanks for the insight and verbiage to begin this process Gary van Warmerdam.

Thursday, June 2, 2011

I am in charge ...OF ME !!!
not sure if I ever knew that...
always reactive, waiting not appreciating.

I love the creation and co-creation process of my life.
slowing connecting to the support web of all.

I am greatful to be EXACTLY were I am at.

Thanks to everyone last of everybody!

Friday, May 27, 2011

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

To Sweet Emery

"Because I love you so much...

I'm just... amazed! I never knew I had so

much love in my heart... I feel so blessed...

I'm so happy that you're in my life... I just

want to savor this moment . . . . I want to

burn it in my memory... I want to remember

it whenever I feel disconnected from you,

because this Love is so powerful that there's

no hurt it can't heal! Even if I sometimes

forget, this Love will always be here...

Right here in my heart...

I will always, *always* love you!"

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